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Finding a compromise

May 17th, 2008 at 06:33 pm

I'm sure I'll revisit this and find something I don't like.

This is going to be a lonnnggggggg process.

Goal 1 - get out of debt
Goal 2 - DH see his family
Goal 3 - I see my family
Goal 4 & 5 - I get my masters degree and DH gets his motorcycle

Problem is... I've realized we can't be on either extreme. We can't make getting out of debt the ONLY goal that we sacrifice seeing our families. His family is so poor... they are on welfare and can't go anywhere. Really, I hate seeing them - its a moment I'm glad he's in the Navy and I only have to worry about seeing them every other year.

Meanwhile my Dad can't travel here cause he's partially handicapped and recovering from cancer.

So our compromise... which I'm not thrilled about... but its the best we could come up with. I get to keep my "No more CC rule" and we still get to work towards our goals.

With his trip reimbursements from this summer, we'll pay for his trip to see his family in cash. Then in October when he gets his bonus, we'll use that and the savings I've saved in the meantime to purchase the tickets to Hawaii to see my family.

Then between then and April, I should be able to save enough to cover the rest of the Hawaii trip (food, hotel, car rental, gas for the rental car).

That of course leaves the motorcycle and my master's degree up in the air. I'm taking a course this summer and fall... each class is $1K... DH wants to buy a bike for $6K. He thinks we can use our tax return next year to pay for the bike... but I adjusted his withholding... sooooo we'll see how that pans out.

I'm really not focusing on the bike - we reached a compromise to not use the credit cards anymore, adjusted his withholding to have us pay more monthly on the credit card.... pay for the trips to see family in cash... and yeah, I guess if there is enough of a tax return it can go to my degree and his bike.

I don't know.... I don't feel 100% about this but I'm not tempted to bring up "Well the tax return next year may not cover the bike" cause I'm worried if I do... he'll get up in arms about it and fatalistic about it and I'll lose the progress I did make to

1) Agree how to pay more on the CC each month
2) Pay to see our families in cash

Sooo, since I recognize this is a process... I'm going to recognize that progress... stop... get to that goal... and then move forward. One step at a time.

Posted in Goal Setting and Negotiation | 4 Comments »

4 Responses to “Finding a compromise”

  1. Amber Says:
    May 17th, 2008 at 08:25 pm

    Hope your dad is doing well. I say work on one goal at a time it is usually easier to accomplish, but you have mapped out a plan that I think will work. On different note take your time getting your masters it will be tough but worth it. I have been in school for the last 5 years and let me tell you time went by so quickly it doesn't even seem like so long and I am getting ready for my graduation in the spring. It could have been in the fall if classes weren't cut but oh well. As far as the motorcycle, I say save aggressively and pay cash, 6k is easier to come up with and possibly 8k...good luck Smile

  2. Carolina Bound Says:
    May 18th, 2008 at 05:21 am

    You have to see your families, and in your case it is costly, so you have to make that a financial goal. So I agree it makes sense to have mutliple goals.

  3. Petunia Says:
    May 18th, 2008 at 06:05 am

    The time will pass whether you have goals or not. Having something to shoot for will make it much more likely that you'll achieve your what you want. You're on your way!

  4. managinglife Says:
    May 18th, 2008 at 06:54 am

    I noted that your DH is active duty in the USN. There is a resolution to your educational expenses. Did you contact Navy College on base? There are many programs that you are eligible due to your status as a dependent of an active duty or retired military member. There are tution stipends and free grant funding that pays for your education. There are tution program depending on your DH's rank would pay for your courses with the exception of books. There are also scholarship (state and private) programs that are available for military spouses and children. The staff at Navy College have a wealth of knowledge that can assist you with attaining your graduate degree. Good luck! Let us know your progress.

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