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Happiness and Finances

April 14th, 2010 at 06:33 am

I truly believe that if you're happy in life - TRULY happy - your finances will take care of themselves because who we are as people, have no need to consume or spend more than we need. If we are truly happy, we already have what we want and need.

Of course this doesn't relate to certain emergencies. Like $5K to travel back home to Hawaii to see my Dad's funeral, etc. But I'm talking about the types of finances that we are in control of. Its those behaviors that really determine our true financial picture and whether we are headed towards success of failure.

I thought more about my last post. I know how I say I take better care of myself when DH is gone, but there is another part in there that I sort of eluded to: I also spend more frivolously when he's gone.

Even though I may be handling a situation well on the surface, my finances show the true picture. $30 on shampoo & conditioner? Considering the purchase of a waving iron and spending hours on my hair.

Bottom line is... I spend more when he's gone because I'm not happy. I go through the motions, I do what needs to be done and I don't dwell on it on the surface - but I know a huge part of me misses him and although I can ignore those feelings to get what I need done, they still surface in other ways.

He came back yesterday and it was like an instant thought... I no longer needed all the extra stuff to make me happy (or to get my hair the way I wanted it). It was like instant happiness. I stopped thinking about all the things I wanted to do to make myself happier... I just was happy in that moment and didn't feel the need to buy anything or do anything else but be with him.

Overall, regardless of how mathematical and scientific I want to be about my finances - the bottom line is that a level of psychology is involved because of the human element.

He did get me a necklace and bracelet while he was away in Panama. It was his last trip there and he wanted to get me something. I thought it was sweet. I'm not really one who wants a souvenir because it just takes up space... but he knows that jewelry is one area that I'll always appreciate.

I know he didn't spend much on it, but that doesn't matter. It could have cost him a penny and I'd still love it. Its like my earrings from Dubai, I can look back on them/wear them and know there is a story behind it. And if I ever pass (I make it sound like death is optional LOL) then its something the kids can have and know the story too.

My mom STILL tells the story about how my grandfather came back from a deployment and gave my grandmother a diamond (now worth $10K), but my grandmother was disappointed because it wasn't a pearl. But still... 30-40 years later, my mom remembers it and still wants that diamond one day because she can remember where she was & that moment in time he gave it to her.

But anyhow, aside from that we went out to eat yesterday cause we got back so late from the airport. However, again - we paid with cash so it was nice to do.

Overall though, I'm just glad my hubby is back. I missed him and its amazing how happiness can affect your spirit... cause to tie into all this, I also have a renewed vigor for studying for Regulation. I finished 70 of the 195 multiple choice questions yesterday and plan to get through the rest today and start module 4 tomorrow.

So long story short, I may look better and be more productive when he's gone - but my finances are better when we're together and I'm happier.

4 Responses to “Happiness and Finances”

  1. creditcardfree Says:

    I look better when my husband is gone, too! I end up eating too much of the junk he likes when he is around.

  2. Joan.of.the.Arch Says:

    I stay up too late when my DH is gone.

  3. Tabs Says:

    These are some very insightful thoughts.

    I especially like the first paragraph. I think money helps in the path towards happiness, but in the end, happiness is beyond money.

  4. pjmama Says:

    We all change our behavior when our significant other is away, and deal with the stress in different ways. It's good that you recognize that and can stay conscious of it. Keep up the good work!

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