AmbitiousSaver's Personal Finance Blog

So, back when I found Dave Ramsey's book (about a month or so ago), I also included my best friends in on it. One friend who is a millionaire already & she has been my best friend since we were 11... her job was to help keep me & my other friend accountable.

She & my other friend knows every detail of my finances and it hasn't affected our friendship. But she's probably the only person who KNOWS me that I can do this with.

I bought a Kindle 2 yesterday. I had wanted one for quite awhile (although awhile in my terms means 1 year). Bad part about Amazon remembering credit card numbers on there, it makes it so easy to spend $$$ there.

My reasons were mainly because I read A LOT, and I like to keep my books... but I just don't have the space to keep up a large library.

So I bought it off my debit card.

BUT when you factor in that I'm planning on about $5K in additional expenses because of the Hawaii trip next month to see my Dad, even though its on my debit card - still doesn't mean I did well just cause I bought it off my debit card.

DH called me too from South America today & I told him. I had made the purchase before I went to class and in class thought about canceling it, but by the time class was done and I checked on the order - it said it was already getting ready to ship.

Anyhow, I think having to confess my purchases and bad moves every time I make one - sort of keeps me in check. I feel like I'm making more bad moves nowadays and I think deep down even though I'm starting to feel more "okay" about whats going on with my Dad... I'm probably still struggling with it.

Key is now that I need to recognize this & next time I want to use that debit card, I need to remember that now is not the right time for me to buy anything because even though consciously I'm becoming more accepting of what's happening, subconsciously I may not have addressed all of my feelings.

On the way to dropping off DH for another "mission"... we got a chip in the windshield from a rock.

No big deal, we used Safelite before to repair chips in the windshield. An unexpected expense of $96.95 wasn't going to hurt me and they'd come out to my home to do the repair. My deductible is at $500, so it'd make no sense to file an insurance claim. Or so I thought.

I didn't realize till today though that USAA will pay for my windshield to be repaired at no cost of my own.

So now I have the Safelite guy coming out to my house to fix my windshield & my insurance is going to pay for it at no out of pocket cost to me.

Thats what it ended up costing me in the end.

Back in '07, Dad paid for our airfare to Hawaii (we paid for our food, hotel and rental car). Being partially handicapped from his brain tumor in '92, he can't fly long distances so he could never visit us on the east coast.

So I had racked up a LOT of miles with Delta from that one trip... 5 tickets, 5K miles one way... then we also did a trip to Vegas that year.

So the ticket cost $160, then I had a rewards redemption of $100 on my AMEX. So I redeemed my points for that ticket. Final cost:

$60 Net for the ticket
$20 for checked baggage there
$15 for checked baggage back (did online check-in)

And for that $95, I received:

Peace of mind to know my Dad would get to see my youngest (he had never met her before)
The ability to see my brother (whom I'm close to but hadn't seen in 4 years cause he lives in Oregon and was visiting that same time I was there)
The additional peace of mind to know how my Dad was really doing & that even if he did or did not make it to October... I would get to see him

I think that was the best $95 I ever spent.

So I've been coping. I talked to a friend today, our dads bodyguarded Elvis together...so my friend's family and our family go WAY back. As I said, they bodyguarded Elvis together & were both police officers.

She told me she'd be a wreck if she were me. And I told her, a part of me somehow knew this was all going to happen... and in a way, I've been preparing for this for years.

While my Dad was busy writing his will & paying for his funeral... I was busy doing my best to hold onto all the memories I could of him.

In 2000, for an english assignment, I interviewed him about stories about his life. In recent years, I started saving all of his letters to the kids.

This year, my other best friend gave me a Livescribe pen, so I started recording conversations between me & my Dad. I even asked him to start writing something to the effect of "memoirs". He started it, but I know its not completed.

Never the less, I spent a couple days this past week compiling everything and was amazed to find that just between the stories & what my Dad put together... there is 41 pages (8x10).

So I told my best friend, that is probably why I'm able to hold it together as best I can.... because I have so many memories of him that I know that even when he does go... the memories and legacy that he has left behind will always remain, and if I ever think I'm about to forget - I have all of this to remind me.

In a way, seeing him deteriorate from the man I knew 2 years ago leaves me in a state that - is hard to describe. I love him and I know I'll miss him forever & I NEVER want to say goodbye, but I don't want to be so selffish to hold onto him that he is not allowed to die with the dignity he deserves. If that makes any sense.


So yeah, I'm coping... Tuesday was the last day I cried and for that I'm grateful. Crying everyday was painful and emotionally exhausting for me. I found out on 9/4 that he had metastasized liver cancer (in the docs words "The cancer has practically replaced his liver & is in his lungs") and I cried everyday till I got to Hawaii, then I cried the Monday & Tuesday I got back from Hawaii.

I'm just not sure what to expect with this. I have no experience with this. I've only had 2 people in my life close to me die, and I never knew anyone that I loved who was DYING. I'm sure there is no right way to handle all this... I just have to hope that however I handle this - It'll be in the best way I can.

On 9/4, I received the phone call that my Dad was dying. Financially foolish or not, by 9/10 I was on a plane with the baby to see him & we changed our November trip to see him in October.

Once I got to Hawaii, my Uncle told me that on 9/4, my Dad was told he had 2-3 weeks to live.

So we're coping. I'm glad I went ahead and saw him before October because I don't know if he'll be around then.

Being this is a financial blog, I'm focusing on that aspect of things - but trust me, all the emotions are there - so please don't think I'm just concerned over money.

My brother told me today that he has a $25K life insurance policy that, split between my siblings and my Aunt (who has cared for him all his life). So that would be 5K each, $6250 if we can get our younger sister written out. Which isn't as dramatic as it seems, my little sister has never met my Dad & in her adulthood thinks horribly of him. In 2007 he had written her out of the will, but I guess he forgot about the life insurance policy.

I'm not sure what to do with the money. It would only put a minor dent into our debt but a part of me is just paralyzed - I feel like if I let go of that money, what my Dad left me is gone. I don't want to spend it or anything, I just want it to stay in the bank.

I don't know... if it was any other money, I'd put it towards the debt. But its not, this is the last amount of money my Dad will ever send.

Is it silly to feel this way?

I was fine the whole time I was in Hawaii visiting my Dad. I was there, he wasn't dead yet. Now that I'm back home, its different and its hard to be away.

I know that sounds like an oxymoron, but here I was stressing over how to pay for my college tuition when the answer was there all along. MyCAA gives $6000 worth of funds to military spouses to help them gain skills in the workforce.

Being an accounting major, I need my masters because of the 150 credit hour requirement. I don't want to be a CPA right NOW but if I ever plan on getting my CPA license (which I do), I need 150 credit hours.

This is my last semester but the consultant told me that after I graduate and I want to take a Becker Review course, the program will fund that because I'd still have about $4000 left in available funds.

I'm so excited... less than 12 hours ago I was thinking I'd have to take out loans or put it on a CC, now my tuition is covered.

I'm sooo grateful for this. Something else that brings us closer to getting out of debt! =)

Well we found out last night that DH has orders and that means moving 1000 miles.

We're optimistic because this gets us closer to Hawaii (my home). But its had me nervous cause then that means renting out both houses.

I'm confident we finally have good tenants in the other one. I've even talked to the neighbors there.

That does mean we have to front some additional money. I'll need to transfer my youngest daughter's occupational therapy, my oldest's orthodontic treatment, etc... but I know its doable.

We do need to finish replacing the windows in this house. As I told DH, I want to make sure we take care of everything structurally so that we don't have to worry about the major stuff.

We have the new windows being installed on the 12th but we only did half of them cause thats all we could manage at the time.

I can save up about $18K between now and February to help pay for the remaining windows that need replaced, the landscaping (we have a tree in our front yard with the roots growing toward the foundation of the house), and fixing DH's car.

Thankfully the Navy gives a dislocation allowance to help defray the first month's rent & utility startup costs, so that is good.

I think we can make it work. It'll be challenging but it can work.

The biggest thing for me to accept was now we'll have to start renting a place again. I didn't really want to because houses are so cheap there & you could have a mortgage for less than a rent payment. However, DH keeps reminding me that we don't want to have to worry about keeping up THREE homes and selling/renting it in three years.

He's got a point and it makes sense. I'll just have to hope we find a good landlord that will let us take our big dog.

If we can't find anything... then there is always Navy housing. That would be the cheapest but I haven't liked the schools in that area. Hence we are more inclined to spend more to rent a place outside just to make sure the kids go to good schools.

Sooo... we have 5 months or so to plan a move and get this house ready to rent out. It'd be at a loss but with the market, I could rent this place out for a loss for 10 years and still come out better than if we sold. Plus, if we ever do come back... I'd want to live here again.

I really do love this house, if we could transplant it and move it with us wherever we go - I would.

So all is continuing to go well with our total money makeover. I've used cash for much of everything that I bought.

Yesterday I had to pay in cash to send the certified letter back to the tenants. After totaling all the estimates for all the damages & breach of their contract, it came to $2568, which is $1043 over their security deposit. So I really was being generous offering to settle all this at $365 ($1889 TOTAL... $365 is after application of the security deposit).

So I sent them back a letter with all the estimates, digital photos on an enclosed CD, copies of their move-in inspection and contracts they signed - and basically said that if we don't settle this at $365 and I have to take them to small claims court, I will pursue the $1043+court costs.

We paid for the babysitter for me to go to class in cash. And yeah, I haven't really had a need to go into my wallet to pull out that debit card much.

We needed lasagne noodles and spaghetti... so again, cash. First 1/2 of the braces on Wednesday, cash again. My only slipup will probably be my tuition and books. But I've sort of planned for that too, it has to go on the CC... just which one.

Citi has an offer for 1.99% interest till July 2010 but it has to be with one of those written checks that they give you for balance transfers. Plus there is a 3% fee.

So I'm leaning towards that. But we'll see I have a few weeks to worry about that.

With all thats going on, its nice to be taking a negotiation class during all this stuff with the old tenants going on. My professor is a department head for the university & specializes in negotiation/mediation and consults people in a variety of situations. I definitely thought his insight would be valuable given his experience. In fact, when I initially approached him he told me the best way to approach the situation is make the tenant aware that I'm not trying to take advantage of them.

I told him about the situation the first night of class, and updated him last night. Told him that we didn't include estimates for everything we listed in the first letter (cleaning, curtain rods, and damaged 4 y/o laminate flooring) because we knew it would go over the security deposit by a substantial amount & the tenants were fighting us over $365.

My plan was to write a response letter, include a CD with digital images of all the damages, a copy of their move-in inspection that THEY wrote the stove was in good condition, receipts of when I bought the stove to prove it was only 7 months old at the time of move in, a copy of the additional estimates for the flooring, curtain rods, and cleaning (they didn't clean before they left & that is another thing they were supposed to do according to the contract), and another highlighted section of the contract stating that furniture is not allowed to damage flooring. Their lease agreement is 5-6 pages long detailing all of this and they signed.

The total for ALL estimates would total about $1200 above their security deposit. We only provided estimates for the appliances, wood damage, and siding. And of all things they are disputing the stove.

We were only asking $365 above their security deposit. The JAG Lawyer I consulted said they should look at it as a gift given the damage they caused.

But stating in the letter that if they'll accept the $365, we'll call it done. If not & we have to take it to small claims court, we will pursue ALL damage estimates and associated court fees.

He said that obviously I wasn't feeling good just leaving the deposit as is when I knowingly could seek more & I felt I was being reasonable in the first letter.

My hope is that after sending the letter with the damages, they'll come to their senses that $365 to avoid a small claims suit of $1200 makes better sense. It would probably just be better for me to file a suit, but I don't want that.

He did say that aside from all this, in future contracts I may want to write in that in the event of a dispute we will seek arbitration/mediation resources prior to court. I thought that was a pretty good idea.

So we sent a certified letter to the tenants for damages of $1889 for the stove, refrigerator, and wood damage the dog caused.

The tenants received estimates and are disputing the stove because it was at that "magical number" to bring the damages down to the security deposit - so they would give up the security deposit and not pay any more.

They stated it was normal wear & tear and the stove was like that when they moved in. I provided a copy of the receipt when I purchased the stove. It was 7 1/2 months old when the tenants moved in, and they did not note ANY damage or wear to it on their move-in inspection.

However, the new tenants definitely did. As the new tenants wrote "Excessive scratches & two chips in front" for a 2 1/2 year old stove!!! Yet in other rooms, the new tenants would put "Normal wear & tear" - so even the new tenants think the wear is excessive enough to note it on their inspection.

I've consulted with a JAG Lawyer who said I'm 100% on the side of the law considering these tenants removed a city tree, left the gutters up & let it pool at the foundation, caused the HVAC unit to be replaced from putting filters in that were 2 inches too small & causing visible dust accumulation on the air vents & ductwork.

Not to mention we included in the letter the damages to the curtain rods & flooring. We didn't include estimates for those because we weren't pursuing them... I felt the letter asking for just $364.91 over the security deposit was fair.

The flooring in the master bedroom was $2.29 a square foot. It can't be refinished because it is laminate & their computer chair wore a faded circle in it. The room is 12x14 so the flooring alone is $384... not to mention labor.

The curtain rods were $13.96

But we didn't include those estimates because we knew that would bring damages to over $2K.

I told the Property Manager to let the tenants know that if they wish to take this to small claims court I am prepared to gather additional estimates for the damages they agreed to in the letter (basically they agreed to the damages but disputed the stove - I only gave estimates on 4 things, refrigerator, siding, wood, and stove). However, there were more things on the list.

When I spoke to the JAG lawyer prior to sending the letter, he said the tenants should look at it like a gift.

I'm wondering though... $52 to go to small claims court & go through the hassle. JAG said they'd help me prepare my case... its a hassle but so was the three weeks we spent fixing up the place for the new tenants.

I don't think I'm being unfair. But I wonder in the back of my head if I should just take the security deposit and leave it at that.

Still yet, I keep remembering what the damages have done to us financially and in our relationship. I didn't get to spend much of July with my husband because one of us was always at the rental trying to fix things & coordinate repairs. We lost a lot because the tenants wanted to let their kids run rampant & be disrespectful.

We are reading a book in my negotiation class... its called Peace v Justice. Boring read but it delves into the concepts of foregoing justice to have peace.

On the flip side, I'm thinking - the tenants should have just been grateful for a bill of $364 vs something more akin to $800 to include the flooring.

This weekend we bought:

Groceries for $251.51
40 lbs of Dog food for $35
Gas for the van $39
School supplies for the kids (which included a birthday present for my oldest) $101.41
and dinner at Olive Garden to celebrate DH making Chief - $75
DH's haircut - $17

This upcoming week I have:
Daughter's braces $352 due on Wednesday
Babysitter so I can attend class $60 (2 classes this week)

Who knew life was so expensive?

Although I still feel like we succeeded, we didn't have to use the CC once.

I only plan to use the CC this month to pay for my tuition. Then we'll officially be doing our "plastectomies"

DH has to take leave next month too cause he has "use or lose"... he was planning on taking 2 weeks and using that time to fix up the car.

We'll need to see how much that will be. I think we may be able to spend $1800 for repairs/maintenance on the car. In October he gets a $3K bonus that we can use to refund the EF & pay down our debts more but as long as we can stay away from CCs I will feel like we're still winning.

DH made Chief!!! And he also made it in the top tier, meaning he'll get paid sooner than later (If he was in the bottom tier it could take up to a year to get paid).

We found out he made it & that he got into the top tier and first words out of my mouth were "GREAT! This means we can get out of debt sooner!" Well, that wasn't my ONLY response but my response to him getting paid sooner.

But I also said that because just before I told him "If I told you we could be debt free in 3 years if we sacrificed a bit, would you be on board?" Of course he asked "What would we sacrifice?" but he got on board with me.

We went out to eat to celebrate. He picked Olive Garden, but I paid in cash with the $100. That left $25 left to buy my daughter her birthday present.

This month's budget was tight... especially now because we'll have to spend $1500 on DH's new uniforms for Chief upfront... so that with braces, school stuff for the kids, and tuition. August looks like it will set us back but we are going to do our best to not lose focus.

So after that we went to Target & bought the three kids their school supplies. I allotted $270 out of August's budget for kids school supplies & clothes. School supplies alone was $101, but it came out of the debit card. I did not use the credit card today. That leaves $170 for shoes & clothes. We probably won't buy them a whole new wardrobe for now but we will buy them what they NEED for now.

Now the induction process starts. Approximately 6 weeks and its been said I likely won't see DH much.

Not sure how this will work because I have class on the 4th, 6th, 11th, and a dental appointment on the 22nd. I'm going to ask around and see if friends will help watch the kids... but worst case scenario is I will have to pay $10/hr for someone to watch the kids. During my classes that is easily $30-$40 per class.

Then my dental appointment is going to be 2-3 hours.

Oh well, him making Chief means an extra $300/month and additional money for the housing allowance, etc. It may be a pain now - but it will pay off.

Cost of making Chief - $1500 + $160 for childcare in exchange for an extra $300/mo + extra in housing allowance, etc

Seems worth it to me! =)

For those not affiliated with the Navy, making Chief is HUGE... it only happens once every fiscal year for a few select. You have to take a test to become eligible then submit a package, a board reviews it & after convening & releasing results... there is approximately 6 weeks of an induction period. Someone once told me Congress is in charge of how many people are promoted to Chief and above... that or to demote someone from the ranking of Chief would involve Congress... I don't really know. I guess making Chief is like making tenure at a university or making partner at a firm.

So yesterday I called to cancel my student loans

Today I stopped contributions to DH's and my Roth IRAs at TD Ameritrade (it was just in an account earning .5%) and transferred that money into our other Roth IRA account.

I also declined the loan approval - to my surprise the lady said "I'm sorry to hear that"

And I thought "Sorry? Don't be sorry, I'm ecstatic"... but of course I just explained to her that we were trying to refocus our priorities and getting out of debt was a bigger priority than buying a new car.

"Oh well, we can help you get a consumer loan or a HELOC"

"No thanks, we should have this paid off fairly quickly and plan to purchase a car after that."

With DR's plan I'm supposed to sell my van cause I can't pay it off in 18-20 months... instead I'm looking at 36-40 months.

But I'm really struggling with that part. I love my van for its reliability, safety, and the fact I never want to buy another one. I plan to keep this vehicle till it dies on us & I mean it... I'm not ever buying another van. I'm thinking worse case, maybe when DH deploys again we'll sell his car and use the money to pay off the van. Then when he gets back we can buy him a car in cash... he wants a new vehicle anyway & I don't see the point in having a new vehicle financed just sitting in the driveway.

I'm buddying up with my best friends too. I sent them a spreadsheet of my finances showing how I plan to pay this off. And yes, this also means now they know EXACTLY how much I am in debt down to the penny. But these are friends that I have known since I was 11 & my other friend since, well, before we were born because our Dads bodyguarded Elvis together.

One of the friends is in the same boat as me... the other friend, she is the one who doesn't have debt & I've asked for her assistance in keeping us accountable. That friend's only debt is her condo, no student loans, car loans, and her husband is part owner at his company, she works at a college... they did receive a settlement. However, they were like this before the settlement. So I figure she would be great to keep us on track cause she also wants to see us succeed. Oh and did I mention we are all under 30?

So now, its waiting for the Chief results. They are supposed to come out sometime soon. We're really hoping DH made it, that would help us on the road to financial wealth track that we are starting.

I'm confident now we can make it, but we have to make some sacrifices. Like I said, I'm stopping our retirement contributions for now. We're currently saving $250/mo towards retirement which that $250/mo could pay off $1000 every four months to get us out of debt even faster.

We'll get there & if we have less debt or NO debt... then we won't need so much in retirement.

My oldest needs braces after all.

Meanwhile, yesterday I received a check from my CC for a balance transfer off or cash advance for 1.99% till November 2010 with a 3% transfer fee.

Here is what I have coming up:

$144 for four extractions for my daughter
$352 initially for the braces, then payments of $72 for 8 months
$2037 for 2 graduate degree courses for my master's
$150 (estimated) for books

This all happens to be in a month that I have 3 cavities (old cavities but the silver fillings are deteriorating) filled & I have to buy the three kids their back-to-school stuff and clothes. I alloted $213 for my dental work, and $270 for the kids' school stuff out of our budget. The stuff listed above was what I didn't have left in the budget (I.e., ran out of money).

Looks like we're shopping at Target and the clearance rack for new clothes. I just hope the $270 will be enough. Last year we spent $300 on clothes alone for them for back-to-school.

I looked in my wallet yesterday and completely forgot I had $50 in there. Imagine the pleasant surprise I had. That money, in conjunction with my birthday money (last Sunday), I have $100 in cash not in my EF.

I also have $1000 in my EF. Not quite enough to cover everything.

I'm thinking about taking that convenience check and using it to pay my tuition and books. Then using the EF & the $100 to pay for my oldest daughter's braces.

September's goal according to DR will be working on refunding that EF, then using whatever other money we can find to pay down the debt.

Action Steps I've already taken have been to call my university yesterday & confirm that I am canceling my student loans. May sound silly to put my tuition on a CC vs student loans, but my SL would be at 6.8% - not 1.99% and I know I'll have it paid off by November of 2010. We should be CC free by February 2011

The one thing about all this house stuff going wrong this year... it just means to me there is less likely to go wrong next year that isn't covered by warranty. We replumbed the rental... you can only do that so many times & it has a 25 year warranty. Same with the HVAC we had to replace, that has a 10 year warranty. The only thing left to do on the rental structurally would be the roof & that is still good for a few years.

We had to get new windows cause ours were leaking, they have a lifetime warranty too.

So really, all the stuff that did go wrong this year - in the end isn't all THAT bad, the bright side is that is that much less I have to worry about in the future. Meanwhile, going on DR's plan will hopefully keep us from having to go into debt again when stuff like that happens again.

BTW - According to DR's plan... and after doing projections for our budget, we should be debt free (except our mortgages on the rental & our house) in February 2013. So 3 1/2 years away. That is allowing us $200/mo of "wiggle room" in case something comes up so we don't have to use our EF and letting the kids buy lunch 1/2 of the time & planning for our 18 month old to go to preschool in 2011.

So I've read the first two chapters of Dave Ramsey's book

And the biggest thing that stuck out to me was about not borrowing your way out of debt. Debt just doesn't make sense at all.

In August, I was planning on receiving $9568 in student loans which $2000 would go to tuition and the other would go towards paying off/down my other CC card.

So today I asked myself if restructuring the debt (CC debt into student loan debt) - was really a good idea.

The CC debt is CC debt even if I put it into a student loan. However, if I'm not PAYING on a CC bill - I could delude myself into thinking "Oh, its just a student loan - it's good debt"

SO I'm not going to take out the student loans.

But I'm wondering... its still $2000 I need to come up with. Do I take my $1000 EF and use that to pay towards my tuition and pay off the other $1000 in September? If I don't take SL out then I should have my EF back to $1000 in a month or so.

Thankfully I graduate this December =)

Trying this plan may definitely take me some time to adjust to... but I'm promising myself to stay committed. The good news is I'll have my AMEX paid off next month regardless of student loans or not.

THAT I'm doing completely on my own without having to restructure debt.

Sometimes I'm sure this whole thing feels like a big train wreck getting worse and worse. There really is only one direction if we keep going this way.

The biggest difference I've discovered over last year is... I didn't realize how much bigger a problem this is. We curbed a lot of our frivolous spending... stopped buying new cars & started budgeting more carefully. But we were never prepared for the emergencies or necessities that came up this year.

The end result? $38K in credit card debt alone thanks to repairs needed to be done on the rental, the windows being replaced in this house (and that was only the ones that NEEDED replaced - we still have 11 more windows to go), and yeah... 90% of the debt is due to that.

DH's car is starting to have issues. Its 6 y/o and needing a new clutch, brakes, struts, etc. I think last time we totaled the repairs it'd be $3-$4K.

That's when DH was wondering if we could get a new car.

This is where I'm thankful that although I'm not 100% where I want to be... we're closer. (And I mean this by, we make the right decision in the end... although I wish we wouldn't have even considered the bad decision to begin with)

I was approved for a loan for 36 months at 3.99%. We figured that with our trade, we wouldn't want to finance more than $19K.

Almost like a sign from God, the vehicle we wanted was just not available & the vehicles that were available had so many cons we never signed a deal.

That allowed DH & I more and more time to deliberate over the decision and looking at our cash flow.

I realized that although we were only budgeting $400/mo on food for a family of 6, we were really NEEDING at least $600/mo. Ideally, $700.

The truck he'd want would also get worse gas mileage. So that would add another $100/mo.

Yesterday I basically went up to DH and said, "If we get the car, I'm concerned that we won't be able to enjoy our life. We won't be able to buy the amount of food we want, won't be able to drive the vehicle anywhere, nor be able to do anything. I'd rather just give you the $3-$4K to keep the vehicle because I know keeping the car leaves us better off."

So we didn't get the truck. Instead that $700 we were GOING to spend on financing/gas on a new vehicle will go to increasing our food budget, providing a $200/mo allowance for unexpected things that we need & allow for a few things we want, and the rest to help pay off our debt more aggressively.

My biggest challenge is simply staying motivated. My second biggest challenge is my accounting background and reliance on financial gurus that debt can sometimes make sense - has also had me rationalizing my behavior.

So I started reading David Ramsey's stuff on his website. It was motivating to say the least.

So I picked up the book today. I haven't read it yet. I saw the price of the book ($22) and walked away wondering if it would end up like my Jean Chatzky, Suze Orman, and David Bach books... read once and sitting on a shelf, my life not much different because I've never changed my behavior. Actually, out of those books the book I think I'd be MUCH better off having never read was David Bach - his books are what made me want to own a home & rent one out. I'd probably never had the idea without reading Automatic Millionaire... although the automatic bill payment was probably the most beneficial thing I got out of it & now have around $23K in retirement accounts.

I picked up the milk, cereal, and cheese that I had to get as well - totaling up the cost in my head if I got the book w/the groceries. $35, that didn't seem so bad. So I bought it.

If in the end, I can stay motivated and this can actually help change our behavior - then $22 is well worth it. It's already helped me come up with a game plan to pay off 3 credit cards in the next 6 months just from the website... I figured maybe it would be worth a shot.

I've already reached baby step 1... I have $1000 in an EF.

Next month I'll pay off the AMEX.

By October I'll pay off my CC.

February I'll pay off my other CC (I just did a balance transfer from DH's card to mine for a lower interest rate on some of the balance).

And by February 2011, hopefully we'll be 100% CC free.

It seems all too coincidental that right as all this is happening, I am starting class. Tonight I went to my first summer class this semester.

Title of the class - "Negotiation and Dispute Resolution"

I'm taking it as an elective & I have a feeling I'm going to really enjoy the course. The professor is from Ethiopia and exudes an aura about him that is very peaceful, inspiring, and thought provoking. It sort of reminds me of Eckhart Tolle's books to look deeper into the causes of problems to help reach successful negotiations and mediation.

I told him about the situation with the tenant. It all seems so timely how I am taking THIS class at THIS time.

He told me that sometimes we cannot avoid conflict, but his suggestion to me would be to calmly communicate to the tenant that I am not trying to take advantage of her but rather do what is fair.

I am skeptical the deposit will cover all the damages. There may be a difference but even if the deposit fully covers the damages or I write off some of the damages, I anticipate that I will get an email from the tenant when she receives the letter that her deposit will not be returned.

And I don't want to create a bad relationship or bad karma. What the tenants did was disrespectful but I have to move forward now & these tenants run in the same communities that I do... military and we will likely frequent the same stores now that they have moved closer to our neighborhood.

Hopefully all will work out. I'm still waiting on the estimate for replacing the siding with paint on it. The contractors today were very skeptical they could get the paint off without damaging the siding, it would need to be replaced. There are four sections with paint (I found another behind the back door today).

Then the wood trim.... and I'm not even pursuing the floors or the broken curtain rods or cleaning of the property because they did not do it properly.

So I just find all the coincidences intriguing & have to think that we are always given the tools we need to handle any challenge that comes our way. The coincidence that this class occurs at the most needed time reminds me of why I have faith.

Called LG yesterday to get quotes on replacing the cooktop & two refrigerator panels that are badly dented.

$822 for the Fridge including installation
$340 for the Stove
$2 for the curtain rod in the living room
$10 for the rods on the backdoor

I think I'm entirely entitled to getting both replaced. It looks like the tenant used the stove as a cutting board. That is just excessive.

I've had extensive conversations with the neighbors that basically the tenant just couldn't turn her back on her FOUR boys and that she was overwhelmed. The hubby deployed and the house was allowed to get like this.

I'm going to get estimates today on fixing the wood trim. I think replacing it in an unprofessional matter is just careless so I should be entitled to getting that done RIGHT as well.

I won't press the flooring. I used a rejuvenate product and although you can still see its faded if you are looking for it, its not nearly as noticeable.

I'm more concerned with the paint on the siding. If that doesn't come off with pressure washing I'm going to charge her for that too.

The plumbers are working on the house this week to get it re-piped. I'm VERY pleased with them. I've been working with the owner (small business) and he has been wonderful. They are meticulous and careful about one's possessions.

HE was actually the one to tip me off about the property's condition when I called about the estimate. So I'm extremely grateful for that and think I'll use him for future work. Obviously he has standards too if he felt obliged to tell me about my property's condition vs just giving me a quote over the phone & leaving.

I toured the house yesterday after he left, they locked up, put down plastic over the floor to make sure it didn't get messed up while they were working on it, they left a mat on the floor with their stuff on it (cause they'll be there all week). So they cleaned up after they left regardless of how much they did today and were very careful about our floors.

Today I have to go back out to the house to meet the contractor the property manager referred me to. They'll be replacing the fascia boards on the house that rotted over time and wood trim on our garage door (Basic home maintenance).

As for the property manager, I let her know that the tenant's defense to the property's condition is that PM didn't inspect the property. Or as the tenant said "These things wouldn't be a problem if the PM had done her regular inspections"

She had also told the neighbors the PM was part of the problem. So I told the PM that and she was floored. She stated she had gone to the property several times and the house was not in that condition, she's responded timely to the tenant, and has documentation proving it. She was floored that the tenant was trying to say that its the PM's fault that the house had those damages when the tenant should have been fulfilling her contract.

The PM told me that she never ONCE received a reference check for the tenant's new place of residence which means that new landlord is in for a BIG surprise. A bigger house doesn't change habits like liking your 3 year old pour syrup on the floors, falling out the living room window, or the mother forgetting her three year old on the trampoline in the rain or leaving candles burning when you leave to go on vacation (all stories from BOTH neighbors).

So I told the neighbors that when I leave I'll give them my info and the PM's info and if there are ANY problems, to let me know.

Hopefully this never happens again. I'm sure the tenant will contact me when she finds out she is not getting her deposit back & possibly a bill. But she'll be lucky if I don't send her to small claims court. She'll probably turn to JAG but I know I have my bases covered with tons of pictures and copies of their move-in inspection.

Here are pictures of the damages. Not much else to write, plumbers are coming tomorrow & the neighbors and I had an extensive conversation. The tenant was just trashy and even a bad parent. They were all glad we were back fixing it up & wanted to know a good family was moving in.

They expressed concern that the property manager is partly at fault. They say no 6 month inspections were done & she wasn't timely in her response. DH has expressed concern because she stated this condition as "Standard" or otherwise, not the best but not the worst.

So we're considering switching property manager. Just not sure when, seems pretty shady for her to screen over 50 people, get new tenants & a lease signed and when the old tenants move out say "We want a new property manager". So we'll see how she handles this turnout, if we have to move and rent this place out I have an idea of a different guy I want to use. Stakes are higher for this house & this guy does QUARTERLY inspections. If we end up liking him better then we'll just switch both places to him.

Oh, and I counted the dents - TWENTY-ONE on the FRONT ALONE. There are two big chips in the ceramic framing of the stove also. We priced replacement PARTS ONLY for the stove & refrigerator and it comes to $1100. Their deposit was $1525

STOVE




Bent curtain rods





Refrigerator









Paint on the siding & their shoddy repairwork to fix the damage to the wood trim from their dog



Closeup of the "fix" to the trim



More paint on the siding (NOTE: The two little handprints) - This better come off with pressure washing

We did the move-out inspection with the tenants today. The property manager said it wasn't the worst she's seen, but not the best either.

The tenants said they paid professional cleaners but there was still 2 large burned in rings on the smooth surface of the stove. After taking a razor to the stovetop for 2 hours, I discovered lots of scratches on the ceramic framing of the stove & 2 large chips.

The stainless steel fridge was left with ONE dent in the upper panel. NOW, there are 15-20 dents in the bottom (french door style) as if they would just kick the freezer shut.

There is also a large faded circle on the laminate flooring in the master bedroom.

We put in the flooring in 2005, it had a 25 year warranty against fading. So this is excessive wear and tear.

The refrigerator was $2K and also bought in 2005. The stove was $1500 and bought in 2007.

The repair to the woodwork on the back door trim due to their dog chewing it... was shoddy. Basically they just put wood filler in and painted. It looks like putty and is FAR from a professional job.

There is paint on the siding on the front of the house with two little handprints (her kids) on there as well.

Soooo... now on to the action steps.

I spent 4 hours cleaning the place today, 2 of which was entirely on the stove. While I had myself and the girls at the rental scrubbing baseboards and stains off the wall (another reason I doubt a professional cleaning was done because there were still crayon marks on the wall and all it took was a magic eraser to get them off), DH sold our Plasma TV for $600.

With the $600 we went to Home Depot and spent $190 to get painting supplies (we're going to paint the place ourselves) and this thing called "Rejuvenate" to see if the floor could be salvaged. Being laminate, once its faded - its done. You can't refinish it like hardwood.

It looked fine once we applied it, so I'll see how it looks tomorrow. There is also some basic home maintenance that needs to be done:

Replacing some broken siding
Replacing a rotted fascia board & wood trim on another door
Replacing a broken light on the front

So not HORRIBLE. The excessive damage on the appliances is what we were mostly upset about but if we can deduct that from their security deposit to see if there is any way to get them fixed - that will be ideal.

Its all sort of a pain but I keep telling DH and myself that in the end, this will pay off. Someone else is paying our mortgage and we are just doing what is in our best interests which is to maintain what is ours. Years ago we made the decision to buy this place, so we're being responsible, going to fix it up, and even after WE cleaned it today I started feeling better.

I have a feeling that as we keep helping the property to get to what we had it to, all this will become a memory & the new tenants will be better. For one, only three people will be living there versus six. In addition, we screened over 50 people before picking them.

I look at it this way, we made some bad decisions in the past. When our previous tenants came up we just wanted someone to rent the place, and that's what we got. We learned & are making better decisions now. Now we want someone who will value this property and be great tenants, not just give us a check every month to live there. I know tenants will never treat a rental the same as their own, but I believe its perfectly reasonable to want someone who enjoys living in a well-kept home.

My property manager thinks I'm being picky and constantly says "No one will treat this home as well as you will." Which I understand, BUT I want our tenants to KNOW we value this home. I want them to know we pay attention to how it is cared for & hope that in making that statement, they will follow suit and treat it well in return.

They've actually done studies that in neighborhoods where people were proactive in maintaining their residences, people in general cared more about that neighborhood. Perhaps it is that Law of Attraction stuff, if someone else sees you placing value on something - they are likely to as well.

We'll get it done. This hasn't phased me off of being a landlord. Just taught me valuable lessons - have a proactive property manager, screen tenants carefully, document everything, and maintain your home.

When we're retired or not here, we'll just have to hire people to do this for us - but until then, I have no issues whatsoever putting a little sweat equity into it. I did receive over $30K over the past 2 years from these people and lots of deductions for it on my taxes.

So yeah, despite its occasional pains - still worth it IMO. After all, anything worth anything is worth a bit of work and investing a piece of yourself into it.

I took pictures of the stroller/travel system, Plasma TV, and the desk so I plan to put them on Craigslist later today.

The inspection for the rental got pushed back to tomorrow.

Then we took the van to get the oil changed. While there we asked them to check the rear windshield washer because the water line wasn't working.

I was so proud of my four kids. We were there for 3 hours and they took it so well. Turned out that the line to the rear windshield washer had been chewed through, maybe a rodent or something? Not sure when it happened but we think it was when we went to Missouri in March because we noticed it not working then.

So it cost $43.99 for the oil change, $98 to fix the rear windshield wiper. I felt good though that I had the money in savings so I wouldn't have to add more to a credit card.

Being at the dealership that long, DH kept talking to me about a new car. But as we kept going over it, walking by all the new cars - I kept getting that feeling in the pit of my stomach that "Yeah, it may be nice to buy something but what he is talking about is not what we really WANT."

So we'd be settling, and we don't want to. We have a great car right now that we don't have any car payments on. At the very least we plan to pay off the van before considering something new & not having to worry about the van payment will likely free up a lot of money for us to get what we want when the time comes.

Other than that, not much else. No additional spending, just on the car - so we stuck to the plan and I feel good about that.

I'm feeling more and more positive about everything. As if I had been asleep for the past six months & I've had a new beginning or awakening.

We leave in an hour or so to do the move-out inspection. I'm confident that our tenants did a wonderful job & that all of this is a start to something new.

I'm not entirely sure what the future may hold or where I'll be living in a year from now (Military) but I have the confidence that no matter what happens, its for the best and we will land on our feet.

Speaking of which, that reminds me that I need to list the plasma TV on Craiglists and a few other baby items. We had a garage sale in May but there are some bigger items that I need to get rid of. The clear space & extra money will help add to a sense of freedom.

I think it all started with a desk to be honest. We were credit card free back in June '06 and I wanted a desk. We had $1000 in a CD & I told myself, "Lets buy this desk, its for my home office. I'll put it on the CC, cash the CD and pay off the credit card with it."

Well, I did the first two, but I never followed through on the third. And once I had a credit card balance again it made it easy to charge things up.

I think once I can get rid of the desk & the source of what started all the debt, the feelings from that will start to cause more momentum to help us get back to our goals.

As we pay off our debt, I plan to continue reducing our credit lines. Not necessarily because I think I can't trust myself, but because I am so confident I will not need those lines of credit that I have no need for them to be open. I guess I could use the analogy of how I felt getting married at 18. I was so confident I had found the man of my dreams that I was going to get married that young and not worry about "What I may miss" or "Something better coming along".

Ten years later, I am still confident about who I married. I've learned more from him as my life partner than any other relationship I've had.

But thats a different story.

We should find out next week if we can go back to Hawaii or the West Coast, wish us luck. So many people have told us its impossible for us to go back with four kids, especially now - but we've wanted this for so long, THAT is where home is. And no matter how many people tell us it will never happen, I know it will - its just a matter of when.

And I love DH's persistence. Even though his detailer said it would never happen, he said "Well, I'll never know unless I ask and I'll keep asking until they tell me to stop."

Wish us luck, I have a good feeling about it all that in the end, everything will all fall into place so perfectly even I couldn't have planned it.

BTW, Financially the only thing I plan to spend money on is getting the oil changed in my van. Then its home for dinner, dessert, and movies

We finished watching the movie, and I'll be honest. I loved it. If not for the sheer fact that on some level I could identify with it and on the other being thankful for the awareness to recognize it as well.

Shopping isn't quite so much my thing. Clothes, no.

Cars, eh... I'd like to say no - but 15 cars in 10 years of marriage says otherwise. I think we've curbed that. No car purchases since January 28, 2008. We've even done our own maintenance on our paid off (although that is not entirely true, the debt was restructured into my student loan - but we do hold title to the vehicle) 6 year old car. If DH keeps his car past January 2010, it will be the longest we've ever owned one car (3 years).

Home stuff... THERE is my fault. Ok, and skincare. I love Clinique. I did stop highlighting my hair. I've been back to my roots for a year & love how healthy and shiny my hair is. I get it cut maybe 3-4 times a year for $25/each time. I tried one of the bargain salons & ended up just spending more money to get a stylist to fix a bad cut.

But anyhow. Thats my fault, things around the house.

Its not any ONE thing. Its seeing things break around the house & thinking what I have needs to be replaced.

Case in point:

Our desktop is 5 years old, 3.2 GHz, 512 RAM but its slow as ever and keeps saying I don't have memory space. My laptop is 2.1 GHz, and I don't know the number of RAM but its only 2 years old and is so loud now that you can hear it on the phone.

I browsed online all day looking for a new computer to replace them both. Consolidate them down into one. I thought since I was price comparing THAT was at least a step in the right direction vs the $3K and $2K I initially spent on the computers.

DH came home and off to the store we went.

But as I was getting in the car, I had a feeling come over me. That feeling of - I don't really NEED a new computer. Yes, I work from home and if I absolutely NEED one my work gives me a $1200/year office allowance so I can always buy a computer with that money, but my computers both work fine. A little slow, but they work - no viruses.

And I'm always talking about how I want to spend less time on the computer. I'll admit it, I'm addicted to being on the computer - but when you work on one, that makes it a little bit more challenging to just "stop". But thats when I realized, going from 2 old computers to 1 NEW computer is not going to make me get on the computer less. If anything, it'll put me more into debt and I'll probably want to be on the computer MORE because it'll be fast and new.

No. We didn't buy a computer. I just didn't quite see the necessity after I put it into perspective like that.

But I did buy SOMETHING today. After dinner I was craving something sweet so I took my oldest to the grocery store with me.

I walked up and down the aisles price comparing cookies, brownies, cupcakes, then cake mixes to premade cakes. Ugh! I wanted convenience but convenience OBVIOUSLY costed $10 more.

SO we bought cinnamon rolls that you had to bake in the oven. Sort of convenience because it could be done in 15 minutes, but at $2.97 was a bit better than $4.97 for 6 cupcakes. We also bought some mix to bake a German Chocolate Cake later. I think total it was $6.22

And while I'm on this confession kick, as I was checking out my daughter asked if we could by a lottery ticket. There was this new Corvette scratcher & DH LOVES Corvettes, so I let her get a $5 one.

I don't carry cash on me so I asked the customer service guy if he could give me cash back from my debit card so I could buy the scratcher for my daughter to give to DH. He said I'd have to buy something & behind him was a bunch of cigarettes, and I don't smoke. So I told him to just put $5.00 on the lottery and give me another $5 for the scratcher.

Sooo plus side... I didn't buy a $1250 desktop, I decided I didn't need a new computer

Downside... I spent $16.22

BUT... it was on my debit card, so I only spent money I had. And the sweets can't be entirely bad, nor do I really think the scratcher was (No he didn't win anything). The sweets we had to bake together as a family, the Corvette scratcher was something that reminded me of DH - not cause I actually thought I'd win - and well, the lottery. Well... ok, perhaps I'm rationalizing the scratcher and the lottery ticket

But really, I think if I knew I was going to falter in some way - I'd choose the $16.22 over the $1,250 ANY DAY.

Wish me luck tomorrow. Our tenants are vacating the place so we're doing our move out inspection & on Monday the plumbers will start work to replumb the house and get the old plumbing out.

But I'm feeling really good about it all Some of the comments you guys have left the past few blog entries have resonated with me so much & brought me back. I'd fallen off the saving wagon for awhile but the comments and inspiration this place has provided in the past few days have inspired me & I know I'm getting back on track. So... THANK YOU!

So I know Suze Orman doesn't recommend reducing credit lines, but doing so actually makes me feel better. To me, its a way of helping me to control my spending and forcing me to not rely on credit cards.

So I called up one of my card's today and reduced the credit limit to just above my card balance. Then I did a balance transfer to help pay off my other card at a lower interest rate. Once that processes, I'm going to cancel my other card. So that is reducing my available credit by $17K.

Perhaps it will hurt my FICO score but at this rate I don't really care. I don't want the opportunity to get into more debt.

If it lowers my FICO score then I know it'll reduce the chances we'll be able to get a good rate on a car loan or any other sort of loan - so maybe that isn't a bad thing. A bad interest rate will make me less enticed to rationalize another loan.

Maybe this is a mistake? But if it is, it feels really good and reassuring that I now have a lower credit line meaning I'm less likely to get into much deeper trouble.

I find it so tough to stay motivated & I need it. Feels like everything is hitting us at once and we are worse off than we were 6 months ago.

We had to replace the HVAC system in the rental, we are replacing the plumbing next month, and due to a bad storm last week... discovered we need new windows because they were leaking (cheap builder grade windows that are 12 years old).

We contacted our window contractor we used with the other house... energy efficient lifetime warranty windows. To do the entire house... $27K because some of the windows are custom. After doing numerous hours of research we decided we wanted a good product for life vs another cheap product we'd need to replace in a few years.

We're going to do this in phases, so we replaced the ones that NEEDED to be replaced. So that was $9K

I didn't feel great about having to put all of this on a credit card, but this stuff is for the house & to protect it. How do we NOT do it?

So we feel like we're doing the right thing but we're still dismayed. We want to have financial freedom and we can't do that if we have credit card debt.

But now we know in a few years, we'll need to fork over the rest of the money for the second phase of the windows, likely need to replace the doors in this house cause they are rusting.

DH's car is starting to fail. Talked about buying a new one but I told him I never want to have a car payment again. With our credit card debt he knew he didn't have room to argue with me. This is just the way things have to be.

So how do you keep motivation? Right now I just need to know there is a way. I feel like once I see a light at the end of the tunnel, something else happens or something else needs to be done. Windows, doors, car repairs. I know we were over-leveraged to begin with, but we're just trying to correct it on our own.

Bright side - DH is up for a promotion to Chief. If he gets that its an extra $300/mo or so. My company is doing better and reinstating their $1200/yr allowance for office expenses. We found new tenants so we will only have a 2 week vacancy in the rental.

What we want to save for is the 2nd phase of the windows, new doors, and other home repairs that will need to be made. Eventually DH's car will need to be replaced but I'd like to hope that will be when my car is paid off and we can pay for a newer car in full.

But here is where we currently stand:

HELOC $24K
DH's Card (Will be $27K by the end of all these repairs)
The van $30K
Student Loans $38K

So that's what we have to work with... $119K in debt that is not related to primary mortgages.

Good news - we found out we may go back to Hawaii for good.

Bad news - its because my Dad is not doing well health-wise

That also leaves me unsure what to do with our current property. We bought it with a VA loan and the current balance is $382K, the tax assessment is at $357K (It was $390K when we bought the property).

So I thought, "Maybe we could rent it out to wait out this market."

That seems unlikely, our mortgage is $2500/mo and I haven't seen any homes for rent in our neighborhood for more than $2000/mo.

So I contacted my real estate agent and lender (they work together) to see what my best option may be. I'm really not sure what we should do or can do. I love the home and if we ever get restationed here, I'd love to live here again. But who knows if we will come back. I need to do what makes the best financial sense.

We have great credit scores so I'd like to do what I can to keep that in tact, but I realize this situation is above me so I'm currently seeking out help.

We'll see though. If we relocate it won't be till the end of the year, so I have SOME time to figure out the best course of action.

Its funny how the day after I turned in my resignation, suddenly everyone in my house is better.

DH says that was a sign.

I took the baby to her GI appointment today and she's 16 lbs but as the GI doc said, "She's at the 50th percentile for a 6 month old."

So they are going to do an endoscopy & refer us to a food clinic to help us on a more holistic approach to help get the baby's weight up.

I'm nervous about it, its going to be done under general anesthesia and she's soo small. But the Children's Hospital is going to be doing this, so they ONLY work with children - so I feel a bit better.

DH is leaving from the 11th to the 21st or 25th. Normally not a big deal but with finals and everything, I'm scrambling in my mind.

The money is VERY needed though, $113/day and I'm sure he'll spend SOME of it but I told him he better save his money if he expects to buy the iPhone.

He's been bugging me for that for a year or more. I've always held back and if he can save the $400 to get the phone & the increased cell phone fee upfront, I'll let him. He needs the capability of a calendar, task manager, etc in his phone... I have a Blackberry so I can understand, but my Dad pays for my phone so its free on our end. (Not entirely sure WHY my Dad bought all of his kids cell phones, but if we declined it he would be extremely upset as in his eyes its a rejection of a gift. He's been doing this since '05 for my sister & brother, even my brother's wife. Yet my brother is an attorney, its not like he can't buy one himself).

My Dad is like that though. In 2001 he bought me AAA membership and has renewed it ever since.

I think that is his way of trying to look out for us as adults. We never ask for it, he just does it. Anyhow, just wanted to mention that in case anybody wonders why my father pays for my cell phone.

Now my 7 y/o is sick. My house just needs to be quarantined.

I called up my Mom cause I just am frustrated at this point and am nervous about the implications I am leaving with my job. I'm a great student and a great worker, but this is just apparently not meant to be.

She is an employer (she owns a McDonald's... although instead of sick children she deals with people going to jail) and told me resigning likely would be the right thing to do.

I feel crummy about it. I just started on Monday and after working only 10 hours left on the 3rd day early, called in on Thursday, Friday, and by this point I'm sure they have had it with me.

Its all legitimate but doesn't help the feeling. I wanted to give them a heads up in case they check their email... but the timing is just off & if anything is screaming now is not the right time - its this.

I'll call them tomorrow morning to follow up but yeah, I feel crummy about it because this is not my usual work ethic but my family has to come first. The timing is just really bad.

Well, I took the baby to her follow up appointment yesterday and she was not her normal self. Her ped sees her weekly & knows she is usually happy even when she gets shots, so she recommended she go back to get more IV fluids and possibly be admitted.

She referred us to the military hospital and had it not been for having a civilian doc push for her admission, they probably would have discharged her. Its amazing on the discharge paperwork seeing the disparity between her pediatrician and the ER docs.

One says she is lethargic, tachycardic, and has a cap refill greater than 4. The other says she is "tired" but not lethargic, good heartrate and cap refill... but the military hospital admitted her because when they poked her with an IV THREE times and did a urine catheter, she did not cry, wimper, or pull away once. Honestly, if that is not lethargic, the military doctors must think comatose is.

Once she was admitted and on the Pediatric ward it was much better. They kept fluids in her and that seemed to work wonders in keeping her stable. By this morning she was back to her normal self. It was amazing.

Basically she just had a virus but because she was sooo little it was easy for her to go downhill fast.

I'm just so glad to have my happy-go-lucky baby back.

Man, I am soooo tired!!!!

At 10 pm last night the baby woke up and had diarrhea & was throwing up. She was shaking as we got her cleaned up and thats just when I said she needs to go in.

So I took her in and I LOVE how we live 5-10 minutes away from a brand new out-patient hospital that has NO WAIT for the ER. I literally gave the clerk my name and signed in, and didn't even have time to pick up my bags before the Triage nurse called us.

The baby is normally 16 lbs 11 oz as of last week. Last night she was 15 lbs 13 oz at FOURTEEN MONTHS OLD. So she lost almost a pound in a week and she isn't even on the growth curve, if anything she JUST made it on to the one percentile.

The doc gave her 2 bags of IV fluids and between 10:30 and 2 am she threw up 3 times and had diarrhea 4 times. The hospital discharged us after the baby's color looked much better and she plumped up a little from the fluids. They sent us home with some Pedialyte too.

She really needed the IV. But it was challenging holding a baby for that long & trying to keep her from pulling on her IV.

I stumbled in the door at 2:30 am and we quickly went to bed. Was pleasantly surprised to come home and find DH on the couch waiting up for us. Or he TRIED to wait up for us, he ended up falling asleep cause it got so late.

Then at 6:30 I had to be up again for the other kids. Called in again to work to let them know what was going on.

You know, every time I go to the ER for one of the kids - I'm always thankful for a few things... 1) That we live so close to a hospital 2) That the hospital has no waiting (or in the rare event they do its within 30 min) and 3) That I never have to worry about hospital bills or copays because the kids are on the military's healthcare plan and can still see civilian doctors & facilities.

I think just the healthcare thing could cripple DH and I if we ever had to pay out of pocket. I never forget seeing my son's NICU bill and remembering how thankful I was that we never had to pay a cent of that. It makes you really grateful and reminds us we should never take our health for granted.